The Rise and Fall of Parma FC

Channel 4’s Italian football coverage during the mid nineties was a phenomenon. The Premiership Genration’s alternative on a Sunday afternoon (or for those without Sky) was to tune in to James Richardson coming live from Venice, Milan, Rome or Turin as he introduced the weekend’s big game.

On Saturday mornings Richardson would present Gazzetta, Football Italia’s MOTD equivalent. Once again in some glamorous location, JR would be sat at some swanky cafe with a sexy looking ice cream or cappuccino that you bet your life doesn’t taste like the crap at Starbucks while the beautiful people of Italy did their thing in the background.

Fundamentally, the setting served as an allegory for the sport. While in England football was all about the blood and guts, hell for leather, all heart and no skills and various other clichés, our Italian cousins were all about the flair and skill which we could only look upon in awe.

Serie A was Europe’s top league at the end of the last century. Italian teams had all the money, the world’s best players and were contesting (read: winning) European finals on a regular basis.

In recent years all this has changed thanks to a) the explosion of the premier league over here and b) Italy’s massive corruption scandals.

In any event, back then, Lazio vs. AC Milan was a far more enticing prospect than Oldham vs. Wimbledon.

The influence of Calcio wasn't just about screaming GOLAZZO at the top of your lungs after lashing one into the top corner at lucnhtime when forced to play footy with a tennis ball. Alongside our favoured English side, every kid had an Italian side they would ‘support’ for the sake of variation. My team was not the dominant Juventus, the incredible Milan, or even Paul ‘Gazza’ Gascoigne’s Lazio.

No, as a typical sucker for the underdog, my team was Parma.

Based in the Emilia-Romagna region in the north of Italy, the name is more often associated with the ham than the football club.

Parma FC doesn’t have much of a history and are not as famous as their more illustrious Serie A rivals. In fact, ‘AC’ Parma was only promoted to Italy’s top division for the first time in 1990 thanks mostly to Lire upon Lire of investment from parent company and dairy giant Parmalat.

My love affair began when the club won the now defunct European cup winners cup at Wembley stadium in 1993 – beating Belgian side Antwerp 3-1. They also beat AC Milan in the European Super Cup but were unable to successfully defend the ECWC when they lost the 1994 final 1-0 against Arsenal in Copenhagen.

Parma’s reputation had already been established with the likes of Faustino Asprilla, Gianfranco Zola and Thomas Brolin (when he wasn’t so fat) under the guidance of Nevio Scala, the club went on to win the UEFA Cup in 1995 beating Juventus 2-1 on aggregate. They also reached the Copa Italia final that year but Juve were to have their revenge winning 3-0 over two legs.

When Carlo Ancelotti replaced Scala in 1996, Parma came within a whisker of the 1997 Serie A title – ultimately losing out by just a couple of points.

More Italian Cup and UEFA cup success over the next few years were to follow but it wasn’t just trophies that cemented Parma’s reputation as one of Italy’s top clubs. The players that have been in and out of the revolving door that is the Ennio Tardini reads like a who’s who of footballing greats of the last decade. Aside from the aforementioned Zola et al, Hristo Stoichcov, Fabio Cannavro, Ariel Ortega, Juan Sebastian Veron, Hernan Crespo, Lillian Thuram, Adriano, Roberto Mussi, Hakan Suker, Adrian Mutu and the World’s most expensive goalkeeper, Gianluigi Buffon have all donned the Traditional white (or blue and yellow hooped) shirt.

Parma always found it hard to hold on to these stars and without the prestige and history of the likes of Inter or Fiorentina; players rarely showed any sort of loyalty and would often get itchy feet; using the club as a stepping stone to bigger and better things. Parma was nothing more than the world’s most glamorous selling club.

Then came the Parmalat fraud scandal of 2003. The dairy company’s outrageous financial mismanagement and insolvency meant that, as an asset of company, AC Parma was screwed financially.

As the club fought for its very existence, big names and big contracts were scarce in Parma. In much the same way players had no loyalty to the club, there were no rich benefactors willing to bail them out. Parma was a small club punching above its weight. When Fiorentina suffered similar collapse some years back, they bounced back almost instantly and after today, will compete in next season’s Champion’s League competition. Unlike Parma, the Florence side had the stature, support and backing to make sure they wouldn’t stay down for long.

The last few years have seen some stability return at board level but not enough of a backing to see the club hit the heights of the last decade. The team has been battling against the dreaded drop for the past few years and today, finally, their fate was sealed following a 2-0 home defeat to Inter Milan which also handed the Nerazzurri the title.

A sad occasion for everyone who remembers the glory days.


Like WCW, The Spice Girls, The Super NES and other things popular in the 1990s, Parma’s 15 minutes are up. Serie B football is on the agenda for the foreseeable future and only time will tell if we will ever see Gialloblu rubbing shoulders with Italy’s big boys again.

Fleet Like A Butterfly...

In continuing the theme that football exists outside the premier league/champions league, I feel it necessary to congratulate Ebbsfleet United on winning the FA trophy this weekend after beating Torquay United 1-0.


Following the club’s name change from Gravesend & Northfleet, the Blue Square side were not expected to make much of an impact on proceedings in the league. Pottering on nicely with no-one outside their patch really giving a monkey’s about them.

However, Ebbsfleet hit the headlines last autumn when it was announced that they would be taken over/owned by a fan-run website whose members would be voting on key decisions concerning the club (Including, somewhat controversially, the possibility of picking the team ahead of First team coach Liam Daish - a idea still up in the air).

The game itself was a fairly unspectacular affair with Chris McPhee grabbing the only goal just before half time having seen his penalty saved earlier in the match.

Victory for The Fleet took place in front of over 40,000 fans and in the eyes of many, is a fairytale-like ending to a truly remarkable season for the Kent based club.


Considering the takeover and the circumstances surrounding it, some would say a real blow has been struck for fan power in an increasingly commercially dominated game.

Cynics questioned whether this would prove to be a good idea in the long term but you try telling that to the fans who were at Wembley on Saturday!

The Ibyss Vodcast 03/05/2008

In today's vodcast, I discuss the topsy-turvy world of Championship football as it enters it's final round of fixtures for this season.

Enjoy...

Full English? Not For Me, Thanks.

I’m sorry but I’m thoroughly underwhelmed by this prospect of an all-English Champions league final. We are being told that this is somehow the greatest thing since sliced bread. I for one am not as thrilled as I supposedly should be and I’m not the only one.

Amongst the entire furore, it’s not lost on me, and I’m sure others will agree, that the two ‘English’ sides competing are the two most disliked football teams in the country. Outside of Stamford Bridge and Old Trafford, would anyone really be happy to see either of these sides lift the coveted trophy?

It’s no secret to anyone who follows the beautiful game that CSKA Fulham would be nowhere without their sugar daddy and to seethe fruit of his labours triumph in his native Russia in a few weeks will produce the kind of irony likely to induce vomiting amongst the watching world.

In all fairness, CSKA – normally the Lords of anti-football – did produce somewhat of a classic against Liverpool during extra time to go through last night. However, let’s not let the final result mask the fact that over 90 minutes, it was the fourth draw between the two sides in 5 games this season.

A victory for The Salford Bay Rowdies on the other hand will spawn no end of sycophantic praise for the team and manager alike. While there is no doubting that Taggart is great manager and has a CV overloaded with success and his team play some sublime football at times – both legs of the semi final being the noteworthy exception – they are a deplorable, arrogant bunch who believe not only that they have a God-given right to success but also consider themselves above the law. See ‘Sir’s’ incomprehensible rantings last Saturday as a case in point.

No-one want to see a team like that succeed.

A moment of magic from Paul Scholes took them through but that aside, the Rowdies were comprehensively outplayed by a visibly unconfident Barcelona side who still managed to outplay their conquerors over both games.

But we are told that because the two teams are from England we should be happy. How can we be happy when we know there is no possibility that they can’t both lose?
Supporting an English club in Europe in a concept lost on me. It seems like something of a bygone era when there were very few clubs in European competition. Back then, it was something important to back a team who really represented the nation against Europe’s finest. The rare triumphs during the nineties were something most of the nation could get behind.

Nowadays the money-machine that is the Champion’s League is more like a watered down version of the old European Cup. Back then, it was a true test of how the best in Europe faired against one another. In the modern era you can finish as low as 4th and have a chance to win the big cup.

How can you support the team representing England when four different teams are doing their best to outdo each other?

Is it really a victory for English football if CSKA or the Rowdies win the trophy by beating one another? Also, explain to me how that is a triumph over Europe? Had Liverpool made the final, they would have done so having not faced a ‘European’ side since the first knock-out stage.

Me? Unpatriotic? Please!

In the final we have one side that are owned by Americans, managed by a Scot, whose best player is Portuguese taking on a Russian owned, Israeli managed team whose top player is from the Ivory Coast. Might I also add their kit is made by a German firm and their sponsor is from Japan! Hardly striking a blow for English football.

Once again, I’m sure I am not alone. Fans of the other 90-odd clubs in the English league surely don’t give a monkey’s about two of ‘our own’ in the final. How does that benefit anyone aside from the two sides involved? They’re the only ones who reap any sort of financial benefit and the gap between rich and poor gets ever wider. This final does nothing for the likes Doncaster Rovers, Ipswich Town, Rochdale or Hull City.

Finally, the amount of trouble in Moscow on that fateful May evening doesn’t even bare thinking about. The CSKA mob’s reputation has been well-documented for years and the Rowdies fans are hardly angels themselves. Add that to the expected heavy-handed treatment from the Russian police and undoubted ticketless fans who will try and get into the Luzhniki stadium and you have a recipe for disaster.

Ironically enough, this so-called great occasion for English football could very well see the kind of crowd trouble we all fear and ultimately may lead to UEFA imposing some kind of sanctions against English clubs. They can’t be too pleased about our clubs monopolising their competitions and will find any excuse to prevent it from continuing.

Shire-ly Not?!

Big hats off to East Stirlingshire FC today. A massive 3-1 last day victory against Montrose meant that The Shire finished 9th in the Scottish third division.

To the untrained eye, this is a rather unremarkable feat (or probably not even worthy of being described as a 'feat' at all) but make no mistake, they'll be partying on the streets of Falkirk tonight... maybe.

For those of you who don't know, East Stirling have finished bottom of the Scots third for the last five years. No relegation from the Scottish league means that every season they remain in the division as the proverbial whipping boys. In 2004, the club actually finished the campaign with a pitiful 8 points!

The club subsequently earnt the rather unflattering label of Britain's Worst Football Team.

The Shire have gained cult status internationally and even had a book published about their exploits.

For the gambling man, it's almost suicide not to back the home team when East Stirling are away on the saturday accumilator.

However, despite no relegation, The Shire were under threat. The constant last place finishes had the authorities questioning the worth of the Falkirk based side. Had they finished bottom again this year, the league would have reduced the club's status from 'full' member to that of 'associate' member meaning that a vote would eventually be taken to determine whether they could continue to play in the league.

Naturally, The Shire struggled this season and the dreaded scenario looked odds on going into the final game of the season today when play-off bound Montrose came to Firs Park. Forfar Athletic, the only team they could overhall faced fellow strugglers Dumbarton but could only draw as The Shire came from behind to take the three points and avoid the indignity of being Scotland's worst yet again.

Thank fuck for Forfar (try saying that fast!).

Sir Alex Ferguson was none too pleased about the events at Stamford Bridge earlier but I'm sure he would have raised a smile upon finding out the fantastic news about the club who gave him his first job as a manager.

...or not.

Friday Bits and Bobs

To be Frank...

My condolences to the Lampard family after this week's tragic news.

However, at the risk of sounding callous, why has this story dragged on over the last couple of days? Yes, it's a tragedy but why was it front page news and why am I still hearing about it on rolling SPORTS news channels?

Footballers (like all human beings) suffer berievements all the time but why has coverage of poor Pat Lampard been in the spotlight so much?

Methinks the PR machine is trying to drum up sympathy for one of the country's most disliked players.

Bad taste? Well, that's CSKA Fulham for you!



I Miss You Thierry-bly

So the grass isn't necessarily greener?

I'm not going to subcribe to the newfound assertion that the man that made the Premier League his own for so many years is now crap!

However, it's no secret that Monsieur Henry's Catalan dream is turning into something of a nightmare.

Not once has he talked about how good life is in the sun and he cant stop talking about the club he left behind.

Wenger, ever the diplomat, refused to shut the door on a return for the former Arsenal talisman.

Shame that in reality he rarely signs anyone over the age of 20


Mil-no-moor

Sad news today could see Rotherham go out of business.

The club has gone into administration twice in the last two seasons and have struggled to find a buyer.

When top flight clubs are whinging about their managers not buying so and so or which billionaire owner they would prefer, it takes a story like this to put that all in perspective.

Wes Brown was given a £50,000 a week contract last week (for what?). The Millers' are overdrawn by just(in football terms) a couple of million quid.

Football needs to take a good long hard look at itself when professional clubs are on the brink of extinction.


The Big One

CSKA Fulham host the Salford Bay Rowdies in a 'Showdown' for the premier league title tomorrow.

We're in for a cracker! What with CSKA's unrivalled ability to send the opposition to sleep at The Bridge and The Rowdies prioritising Tuesday's second leg against Barca, it should be one for the ages.

The current CSKA team would be the worst champions this country has seen. Even their own fans will tell you that (if you can find them. None will be at the game). In a bittersweet sort of way, winning the title would actually be quite amusing. The experts have had a field day telling us that expansive, exciting football is the holy grail. If CSKA bore their way over the finish line, Sky TV might actually implode on itself.

Ronaldo has been brilliant this season. A bag full of tricks, incredible pace and an eye for goal have made him seemingly untouchable. And just when you thoughts there was no end to how amazing he is, the boy added a touch of the supernatural to his game as he actually DISAPPEARED at the Nou Camp on wednesday. The boy's a genius. Expect him to pull the same trick in another big game tomorrow...

Something Is Seriously Wrong

*Blows off cobwebs*

This was recently doing the email rounds.



John Arne Riise's alleged payslip.

If this is indeed real, something is fundamentally wrong in the world if someone being paid THAT MUCH to play football cant kick with his right foot!



...You really do have to wonder sometimes.