Weekend Observations - Day One. 13th August 2011

New season, same old stories.

Not for the first time, Joey Barton is the centre of attention for all the wrong reasons. If Barton exhales in an open space his CO2 would have enough concentrated rage to start a small fire. When Barton goes for a piss, his urine gets charged with GHB against the sewage systems throughout Britain. His inability to stay out of trouble has become so ridiculous that most people are just fed up with him.

After last season's extraordinary 4-4 draw, how predictable was it that was going to be a tediously dull 0-0 draw? As the snoozefest between Arsenal and Newcastle was drawing to a close, the Gunners' Ivorian summer signing Gervinho made a break into the penalty area and went down. At first look I said 'dive' but consequently replays have been inconclusive. I'm going to plonk my arse firmly on the fence and say that you could make an argument either way. Many people have decided that the apparent trip by Tiote was indeed enough to warrant a spot kick but our very own Shakespearean tragic hero didn't quite see it that way...



Filled with the kind of indignation and rage that would probably cause one to stick a cigar in someones eye or assault someone in McDonalds, Barton raced over to the floored Arsenal man and dragged him to his feet prompting 'handbags' the end result seeing Gervinho sent off after slapping the psychotic scouser. A 'slap' that Barton reacted to be claiming he had been punched and throwing himself to the ground so hard he briefly popped up in Australia. Yes, his reaction to a ‘dive’ was to dive himself and get someone sent off. Irony at it's absolute best/worst.

Earlier in the game, Barton was involved in another moment of controversy when Arsenal's Alex Song appeared to, quite deliberately, tread on the back of the Newcastle man's calf. I'd like to think Song said “tweet this, you mug” or “Song 3:16 says I just kicked your ass!” or something similar. Now, even sat in a Holloway road flat, kissing a signed Ian Selley photo, clutching a Gunnersaurus stuffed toy while watching through the most rose tinted of glasses, there isn't a gooner on the planet who can deny Song was lucky not to be sent off. There is no question about that. I expect retrospective action and a three game ban is not far off. As what was actually the worst offence of the day, this would have been the main talking point and made for a rare occasion where one would actually sympathise with Barton. Sadly, as is his wont, he insisted on being an idiot once more. It's impossible to have any sympathy when the sinned in turn becomes the sinner.

Don't get me wrong, Gervinho deserved to see red. As the laws of the game dictate: “A player is guilty of violent conduct if he uses excessive force or brutality against an opponent when not challenging for the ball.”

Sadly, in football, what the Arsenal man did somehow constitutes “violent conduct”. I personally don’t think a feeble slap counts as “excessive force or brutality” but then again, I would also like not to think of myself as a total pussy. Rules is rules though and at the end of the day, who am I to argue? But this does not excuse Barton's behaviour. His initial show of aggression was at least as bad as Gervinho's and therefore the punishment should have been the same. The pictures clearly show him almost ripping the shirt off the Ivorian’s back. If the Arsenal man is guilty of “excessive force” then so is Barton. 100%. How he only got away with a yellow is simply scandalous.

What right does he have to think he can take the law into his own hands? He couldn't have inflamed the situation anymore if he doused the entire stadium in kerosene and lit one of his infamous cigars. His shameful play-acting afterwards was an affront to any contact sport you could care to mention let alone football. To then claim a punch was laughable. Especially given his own expertise on what actually constitutes punching.

His teammate Steven Taylor was seen to suggest to the referee that it was an elbow that floored Barton. Yes, THIS Steven Taylor. Not exactly the most credible of witnesses.

Almost as disappointing as the dishonesty and behaviour of the players was the immediate aftermath on ESPN. Rebbecca Lowe had a great opportunity to ask Taylor why he blatantly lied but allowed him to squirm his way out of explaining his act of cheating. How can she expect to be respected as a journalist if she is afraid to ask tough questions? Then there was the post-match analysis. Ray Stubbs was once considered one of the finest broadcasters out there but seems to have reduced himself to nothing more than an antagonistic foghorn by trying to justify Barton's actions because of Song's stamp. Didn't his mother ever tell him that Robbie Savage was predictably tiresome in his own criticisms of Barton when he claimed himself to be “one of the dirtiest players in the history of the Premier League” as if that is something to be proud of or it is some sort of competition.

All in all, not one person involved came out with any credit. I won’t even go into what both managers said. The controversies also deflect talk away from how awful the rest of the match was. After the summer-long wait for the start of the Premier League, this first televised match was about as redundant an 'advert for the game' as inviting David Starkey to the Notting Hill carnival in a couple of weeks. If I was watching this in mortuary, I would expect one of the corpses to punch my in the face for subjecting them to this abuse. Arsenal showed very little to convince those that think this will be the first time under Monsieur Wenger that they wont finish in the coverted Champions League spots that they are wrong.

Before his sending off, Gervinho was the most lively player for the away team who dominated from start to finish. But for all their possession both player and team alike failed to produce anything vaguely resembling end product. Same old Arsenal and all that. The Ivorian now faces a three game ban and with both Nasri and Fabregas standing at the door of the Emirates with their bags packed and waiting for the cab to arrive, Wenger might have to take the advice of travelling gooners who spent much of the second half demanding that their manager “spend some fucking money”. With games against Man Utd and Liverpool to come as well as the crucial two legged Champions League qualifier against Udinese all in the next fortnight, Arsenal's season could be in grave danger of ending before it has even begun.

A final word on the gunners. At the end of the game, the players seemed happy enough to shake hands with Barton. Compare this to the reaction to Ruud van Nistelrooy back in 2003. Not that you can condone what Martin Keown et al did at Old Trafford that day but the contrasting attitudes are telling. That was a strong, determined team who were quite literally prepared to show some fight. It's no surprise that team went on to win the title without losing a game while this side of softies is more than likely going to finish the season empty handed for the seventh successive year.

Newcastle too were poor. Chasing shadows from first minute to last and very much second best on home turf. There were little to no encouraging signs for a team that looks destined to fade into midtable/lower half obscurity. Maybe it was just the sound on my TV but even the so-called best fans in the world seem numbed by the dross Pardew is serving them these days. I'd even go as far as to say another relegation is not unthinkable. You heard it here first!

Elsewhere on the opening day, a number of unremarkable results made us wonder why we've been looking forward to this day for so long. Liverpool, who will be hoping to usurp the likes of Arsenal in the top four didn’t really show a great deal to suggest they will following a 1-1 home draw with Sunderland in a game where both sides featured more new faces than a budget cosmetic surgery (unfortunately none of these new faces belonged to Dirk Kuyt).

The main talking point from the game was whether Kieran Richardson should have stayed on the pitch after fouling the fantastic Luis Suarez early on and conceding a penalty. Again, going back to the old FIFA laws, “denying an obvious goal-scoring opportunity” is offence punishable by s sending off. However, referees must consider certain circumstances such as “direction of play” and this is where Richardson gets his reprieve. That said, even though Suarez was going “away” from the goal, the fact he was on his way around the keeper and opening up the goal for himself, it was probably still enough of a goal-scoring opportunity for the Sunderland man to see red without much complaint. The law is an ass!

This game also saw the goal of the weekend scored by Sunderland’s new man Seb Larsson. A superb right footed scissor kick volley from inside the area from a Ahmed Elmohamady cross on the right. For all the daft money spent on players these days, it’s remarkable that a free transfer like Larsson can slip under the radar. Very surprised more clubs didn’t look at him.




Alex McLiesh took his Aston Villa side to Fulham and successfully led them to the first of many 0-0 draws in his inevitably unspectacular tenure there. There was more action at White Hart Lane where Spurs v Everton had actually been postponed due to the riots in the area that you may have heard of presuming you don't live on Neptune. Speaking of which, there's been a lot of talk this week about how best to deal with the looters and rioters up and down the country. I reckon a mandatory season ticket at Villa Park this season would be a fitting punishment. I'd rather be waterboarded. Seriously.

To think that almost two years to day, Norwich City were starting their season in League One with a 7-1 home defeat to Colchester. Rather than try and get the U’s manager that day convicted of some form of brutal sexual assault, the Canaries did the next best thing and hired Paul Lambert instead. Two years and two successive promotions later, Norwich kicked off their Premier League campaign with a 1-1 draw at Wigan. Both teams are expected to be in the proverbial relegation dogfight this season so, as absurd as it sounds, this match was still essentially a big six pointer and a chance to lay down something of a marker at that bottom end of the table. A point was probably better for Norwich given they were the away side. Wigan now face other expected strugglers Swansea and QPR in the next couple of weeks. Failure to get results in those games will see them playing catch up very, very early on in the season.

Similarly, Wolves picked up a vital 2-1 win over poultry enthusiasts Blackburn Rovers. McCarthy’s problem last year was the fact that his side could beat the big boys then struggle against the teams around them. This time around I’m sure they would prefer to reverse this pattern and not have to got through another nervy end to the season where they survive by the skin of their teeth. As for Blackburn, if Steve Kean isn’t given a one way ticket out of Lancashire anytime soon, the Venky’s will find themselves in a right clucking state as they plummet straight down to the Championship. Sorry.



Rooted to the bottom after the first day’s play are newly promoted QPR who were thumped 4-0 at home by Bolton. A defence made up of Fitz Hall, Clint Hill, Danny Gabbidon and Bradley Orr might serve you well in the Championship but the top flight is a whole different ball game. Investment is needed at the club, particularly in defence or else Loftus Road’s experience of hosting Premier League football will be a fleeting one. In the least predictable occurrence of the day, Rangers’ new signing Kieron Dyer was stretchered off injured after just 8 minutes. Hard not to feel sorry for him. It must be difficult trying to play sport when your bones are made of polystyrene and your tendons of wet tissue.

More to follow. In the meantime, hit me up on Twitter

Dead Pool and Striking a Brum note - Relegation Day - May 22nd 2011

I'm really starting to grow tired of Sky and the unnecessary propaganda surrounding all their 'Super Duper Sunday Football extravaganza' parties. Time and time again the actual event quite simply fails to live to expectation. Just this past weekend, 'Survival Sunday' promised tension, excitement and the most dramatic end to a Premier League season in recent memory but like all other 'Grand Slam' and 'Feast of Football' Sundays, it once again failed to deliver.

Hang about, that's not right at all!

That actually turned out to be quite a lot fun didn't it? For anyone lucky enough to have a subscription to the Sports channels and no girlfriend forcing them into taking walks at Kew Gardens because "it's such a nice day", you were able to witness all the drama promised and more and the relegation battle swung back and forth some 14 times over 90 minutes like some sort of ADHD suffering pendulum. After West Ham were condemned last Sunday, five teams were looking to avoid the final two relegation spots. When all was said and done, it would Blackpool and Birmingham sucked into the Championship vortex while Blackburn, Wolves and Wigan were able to keep their heads above water in a flurry of mixed metaphors and convoluted similes.

The neutrals choice, the breath of fresh air and recipients other such patronising plaudits Blackpool went as they came, attacking until the bitter end. Not many gave them a prayer at Old Trafford but for a brief moment as they went 2-1 up against the new champions, Ian Holloway and his tangerine army were in dreamland. Unfortunately, defender Ian Evatt had what qualified doctors would call 'a mare' as he picked the worst possible day to play like a some kind of limpet washed up on the shore of the town's own Pleasure Beach. Already at fault for his side's first goal conceded that day, things went completely pear-shaped as a moment of madness saw him turn the ball past his own keeper to give United the lead in the second half. The reds then cruised to a 4-2 win and this loveable Blackpool team was down and out. It's easy to sympathise with the hapless defender but I'm not sure how much pity he deserves. Yes, he made a mistake but it was a fairly stupid mistake(s) to make. If that's the standard of Blackpool's defence – the 78 goals they conceded in the league would suggest that it is – then maybe the Championship is the place for them after all.



I'll admit it was refreshing to see a team come up and not adopt what a lot of people would call the 'Stoke City' approach but in fairness, the Staffordshire side's philosophy has established them as a Premier League side. The contrasting fortunes of the two teams harks back to the age-old football debate about whether it is better to play well and lose or win ugly. An interesting footnote to Blackpool's Premier League adventure could see them rewarded with a place in the Europa League qualifiers by virtue of the fair play league [Decision Pending].

If Blackpool are given the place, they will join Carling Cup winners and fellow relegatees Birmingham City who lost 2-1 to Roman Pavlyuchenko at White Hart Lane. In contrast to Ian Holloway's team, Alex McLeish's men paid the price for being too conservative. The Blues were not adventurous enough in what was in effect a must win match. Playing for a draw was a dangerous game and in the end it proved costly. By the time they started to commit, they were already a goal down, a more positive approach did yield a fine equaliser from Craig Gardner but it was too late and they were punished further at the death.

So it's Championship football next year but despite this, surely Brum fans will still view this season as a success having secured their first trophy in some 40 years? The Carling Cup win IS consolation as is the prospect of European football next season. Something that may well prove useful for raising their profile but then again could have a damaging effect on any promotion hopes. Time will tell.

Staying up in dramatic fashion are Wigan Athletic who not only looked dead and buried for most of the afternoon but for a good solid chunk of the season too. Just one week earlier, they were 2-0 down at half time against West Ham and their survival chances looked slimmer than Kate Moss in a Vietnamese POW camp. A fantastic comeback that day and a valuable late 1-0 win at Stoke this week means yet another season of top flight football for the Roberto Martinez and his team.

The latics rode their luck harder than a champion jockey at Kempton for much of the game and despite big Hugo Rodallega getting the decisive goal, their real match winner on the day was Ali Al Habsi. The keeper made a number of vital saves to keep them in the game at 0-0 and will surely be rewarded with some kind of pie or whatever it the people of Wigan give out for such feats of gallantry.

Over at Molineux, Blackburn secured their safety by beating Wolves 3-2. However, the latter also stayed up by the skin of their teeth thanks to results elsewhere. On their awful first half showing alone, Mick McCarthy's men probably deserved go down more than anybody and as it is, ought to be grateful for the ineptitude of others for their continued existence as Premier League side. You'd like to think that Big Mick sent a bouquet of flowers and a huge thank you card to a certain Ian Evatt.



Follow me on Twitter

Houllier Than Thou - Weekend Observations 5th-7th March 2011:Part Two

Part One here

Aside from the big game at Anfield, Sunday also saw Wolves and Tottenham battle out a 3-3 goal orgy at Molineux. A fantastic end-to-end game in which both sides went all out for the win saw a return to the scoresheet for Jermaine Defoe who had been previously been on a run so barren that he could have been mistaken for a 45 year old woman trying to get pregnant. Both his goals were high quality long range efforts that might some people reaching for the Big Book o' Footballing Cliches and declaring something about form being temporary and class being permanent. Either that or he'll now go another 11 months without finding the target.

The game was almost overshadowed by yet more refereeing controversy as Mark Halsey only booked Alan Hutton after the latter conceded a penalty in the first half where many would have found it hard to argue if a red had been shown. Even 'onest 'arry admitted as much after the game. What you could argue however, is that the original law is an ass given that the goal scoring opportunity isn't actually denied as such given that a penalty is awarded. But with the law as it stands, Hutton should have walked.

Halsey then ballsed up what would have been a Wolves equaliser when he disallowed a Richard Stearman header for a supposed foul on Gomes. Replays show the Wolves defender jumped fairly and if anything the foul was committed by the keeper who insisted on trying to pin Stearman to the ground as the ball was going in. Wolves eventually did draw level through Steven Fletcher so the decision wasn't as damaging as it may have been.



The draw was no good for either side. Spurs will feel they dropped two big points in their battle for fourth while Wolves would have welcomed a win to help in their ongoing battle against the drop.

Also involved in a thriller were Wolves' midlands rivals Aston Villa who were beaten 3-2 at Bolton. A result makes a mockery of manager Gerrard Houllier and his outrageous decision to field a weakened side and effectively throw their FA Cup tie against Man City in midweek. Aside from the fact his daft claim that his side 'can't beat City' given they already did just a few weeks back, the cup presented an opportunity for the club to salvage what has been a wretched season for the West Midlanders. You would think Houlier would have sought some inspiration from Villa's hated cross-town rivals who were dancing a merry jig on the Wembley surface just last week. Instead, his decision to 'rest' key players for the league blew up in his face as Villa were ultimately undone by two goals from former player Gary Cahill in one of those typical ironies that make football the sport we all know and love – Damien Duff pulled off the same trick in Fulham's 3-2 home win over Blackburn.

Speaking of Birmingham, the newly crowned Carling Cup holders were brought back down to earth as they returned to their battle for Premier League survival and a 3-1 home defeat against yet another midlands rival West Brom.

With so many teams in the region, it's difficult to keep up with who dislikes who more. Interestingly, all four of Wolves, Villa, the Blues and the Baggies are separated by just 4 points and all find themselves in the proverbial relegation dogfight.

It was a massive win for the team now managed by Roy Hodgson who, after what was a disastrous spell at Liverpool, seems to have found his level in the league's lower echelons. Good on him. For his sake, one would hope he keeps West Brom in the division. If I have to look at him being as depressed as he was every time he was in the Anfield dugout ever again, I might cry.

Finally, West Ham have managed to drag their way out of the drop zone for now after an impressive 3-0 victory over Stoke that may well now drag Tony Pulis' team into trouble.

In another vaguely interesting twist, new signing Demba Ba, rejected by Stoke, was on the scoresheet for the fourth time in as many matches for the Hammers who have hit the back of the net a massive 14 times overall during this same run of games. Is that a smile I see there Avram?



Match of The Weekend: Wolves 3-3 Tottenham

Goal of the Weekend: James Morrison

Skill of the Weekend: Luis Suarez



Follow me on Twitter

Roo Beauty! Weekend Observations 12th-14th Feb 2011: Part One

There are times when you sit down to watch this absurd sport we call football where you forget your allegiances, ignore your prejudices and can do nothing other than applaud certain moments of greatness. There are those instances of individual brilliance that one can only look upon in awe.

Of course, one of these rare moments of magic took place in Saturday's Manchester derby and I think it is fair to say that every fan of the beautiful game was thinking the same thing:

Just how did David Silva manage to direct that ball into the top corner off his back?

I kid. Of course I refer to Wayne Rooney's overhead wunderstrike to win the match for United against crosstown cash-rich rivals City 2-1.



In this country we have become accustomed to everything that revolves around Old Trafford, and Rooney in particular, being spoken of with the kind of over exaggeration that would even look out of place in a Jim Carey movie. Manchester United Football Club has almost become a synonym for hyperbole. On this occasion however, when people immediately speak of this as Goal of the season with still a third of the campaign left to play, it's actually quite difficult to argue.

Aside from being just a technically brilliant strike that you imagine 90% of professional footballers would be unable to execute so effectively, the quality of the goal becomes amplified thanks to the situation in which it was scored. If Rooney scored that goal against someone crap like, say, West Ham, while United were cruising at 3-0, we would still praise the quality but we are no longer speaking about it in such glowing terms.

This goal is instantly 'better' because of the added significance: The winner, in a Manchester derby, with both teams going for the title, and Rooney himself having an otherwise poor game. There are few bigger stages on which to score the best goal of your career. After his disrespect towards the club last autumn, the few United fans with any common sense would have been right to be suspicious about where 'Wazza's' loyalty truly lay. Saturday might have just done enough to finally earn their forgiveness though.



After the dross the two teams served up at Eastlands in November, it was refreshing to see two of the best sides in the country put on a far more entertaining spectacle. City and Roberto Mancini get a lot of grief for their style of play and are often lazily labelled as dull or negative. After Saturday, anyone who held this view ought to change their opinion given the fact that it was indeed the Citizens who came out of traps the faster and for my money, were the better team over the 90 minutes. David Silva and Yaya Toure were the best players on the pitch in the first half and had the former put away his early chance, who knows how the game might have turned out? Vincent Kompany put in one of the defensive performances of the season. The eventual matchwinner never had a sniff and it was always going take something sensational for United to emerge victorious.

It is this very trait of The Reds however that has and will continue to lead them to victory after irritating victory this season. Excuse me for indulging in sycophantic cliché but sometimes it is necessary. For all the money spent by their neighbours, there is something present at Old Trafford that all the oil money in the world cannot buy: Team spirit and a winning mentality. This exactly why United will more than likely be celebrating their record-breaking 19th league title come May.

Ferguson's team are now eight points ahead of City while sandwiched between them remaining four points off the lead are Arsenal who showed no ill-effects of last weekend's dramatic capitulation with another comfortable home win. The 2-0 win over Wolves was mainly down to Robin van Persie who grabbed his 9th and 10th goals in 7 league games since the turn of the year. Blackpool are now the only current Premier League team he is yet to score against. Once more, you can only imagine what might have been over the last 5 trophyless years if the Dutchman had stayed fit. If Rooney gets the plaudits for a great individual goal, Arsenal's second gets the team award after a fantastic flowing move.

Mick McCarthy's frank admission that his team were spanked was about an honest an assessment you could get from an opposition manager. 2-0 flattered the away side as the gunners insisted on missing chance after glorious chance to make the final scoreline far, far more emphatic. The overall performance was encouraging given their date with their superior selves on Wednesday. However, if they manage to create even half the number of opportunities they did Saturday, Arsenal must stick them away because there isn't a snowman's chance in Hades they will get away with such profligacy against Barcelona.

Climbing into the top four were Spurs who went up to Sunderland without many of the players who have helped elevate them to such dizzy heights and came away from Wearside with a valuable 2-1 win. No Bale, Van der Vaart, Modric, King or Crouch. All signs pointed to a home win; particularly after the ever-impressive Asamoah Gyan gave the Black Cats a deserved first half lead.

But once again this season, Spurs showed impressive resilience and belief as they fought back from a losing position to take the points - despite the best efforts of William Gallas whose need to change his footwear more often than Carrie Bradshaw led to the concession of the opening goal. The winner was a fine volley scored, once again, by Nico Kranjcar whose recent contributions should force 'arry into a rethink before offloading him in the summer.

Sunderland will ultimately achieve nothing until they learn how to defend – a surprising fact given that they are managed by one of the best Premier League defenders of the early 1990s but less so when one realises that Titus Bramble is tasked with marshalling the backline. Going forward, they are an exciting and quite dangerous proposition but this open nature to their play will always give their opponents hope. January additions Sully Muntari and Stephane Sessegnon will hardly help combat this problem. Michael Dawson wouldn't have found it any easier to score the equaliser if he was playing against nobody.

Liverpool's recent return to form stuttered this week after a 1-1 draw at home to Wigan. Every week there seems to be some debate about active/inactive and first phase/second phases of offside. None of that should have been relevant at Anfield as defender Steve Gohouri scored the most offsidest of offside goals you are likely to see.

For the home side, Raul Meireles was once again the man of the moment after his volley gave them the lead - his 5th goal in six games. After an indifferent start to the season, all of a sudden, the Portuguese has become something of a player. It would be easy to put this down to the 'Dalglish effect' and to a point it's probably true that he has been liberated under the new manager. However, it would be folly to ignore the fact that, like most players from Foreignland, he, unfortunately for Roy Hodgson, needed time to settle in.

Some players however just come over and give the idea of an 'adaptation period' a swift kick in the balls and can become something of an instant hit. Luis Suarez looked dangerous yet again and was unfortunate not to add to his tally of one in one at Anfield after hitting the post and crossbar. When he gets a run of games, the Uruguayan is going to be a frightening prospect for defenders up and down the country for more reasons than his cannibalistic tendencies.




Part Two to follow

Goal-uttony: Weekend Observations 5th-6th February 2011: Part One

If we are to believe that gluttony is indeed one of the Seven Deadly Sins then this weekend saw Premier League fans purchase a one-way ticket straight to the deepest, darkest depths of hell after feasting on goal after net-busting goal. The 41 scored on Saturday alone set a new league record.

"Mmmm... delicious goals!"


The ONLY place to start is at St. James Park which saw what was undoubtedly the game of this or any season in recent memory between Newcastle United and Arsenal. Unless you've been living under rock, in a cave somewhere in Watford with your eyes stapled shut, your eardrums perforated and and your iPhone battery uncharged, you would know that Arsenal somehow contrived to throw away a 4-0 lead in the last 26 minutes of the match allowing a side managed by Alan Pardew and Leon Best up front to come back and draw 4-4.

Themselves no strangers to dramatic collapses and regular humiliations both on and off the pitch, it must have been a refreshing change for Geodies the world over to finally see their team come away from such as encounter with their heads held high. It's far too easy to regurgitate cliches about having a 'never say die' spirit but on this occasion, there is little else one can actually say.

This most improbable of outcomes was partly a result of yet more inexplicable refereeing as the performance of Phil Dowd almost took the shine off of Newcastle's remarkable comeback. Put Kafka, Wittgenstein and Carol Vorderman in a room and they still wouldn't come up with any reason as to how the portly official awarded Newcastle their second penalty. Arsenal will also rightly argue that if Abou Diaby deserved his red card (which he certainly did) at the point in which the momentum begun to swing toward the home side, why wasn't Kevin Nolan also dismissed for a near identical offence after Joey Barton's first converted spot kick to make it 4-1?

In any instance, the farcical refereeing should never have been a factor. Unless Dowd and his assistants were actually tackling Arsenal players and scoring the goals themselves, a side with the undoubted quality possessed by Arsene Wenger's team should, without debate, be able to hold on to a lead against a team as mediocre as Newcastle. If at the start of the game, someone offered any gooner a 4-0 lead but being down to 10 men with half an hour left to play, they would have bitten your hands off.

What it basically boils down to is the fact the once again, Arsenal showed about as much resistance and mental fortitude as James Cordon walking past a cake shop and trying to stop himself going in. For most teams in football, you would be able to write off Saturday's result as a freak occurrence. Not Arsenal. We've seen this kind of capitulation from them a number of times before. Hell, this isn't even the first time they've pissed away a commanding lead this season. You can bet your life that this won't even be last time we'll be discussing this.

Their manager refused to address the obvious problems with his team's comical defence in the transfer window and with Johan Djourou's injury leaving them with just two fit centre backs for a while, Arsene Wenger appears to have compromised his team's chances of success with his stubbornness yet again. The time must surely come when you have to wonder if a man who continues to make the same mistakes over and over again is still fit to lead this team.

Bizarrely enough, the gunners actually ended the weekend a point closer to table toppers Manchester United who finally lost 2-1 at Wolves following yet another poor performance away from Old Trafford. For Wolves, Elokobi and Doyle's goals on Saturday evening now mean they have taken 12 points from United, Liverpool, Chelsea and Man City so far this season – yet somehow they are still currently joint bottom of the league.

Credit to McCarthy's side but if you can't raise your game against the other teams in the league, all your big 'scalps' will ultimately count for nothing when you are back playing against Derby and Doncaster next year. As an aside, isn't it funny that Big Mick was sent to sit on the naughty step last season after fielding a weakened side and essentially throwing a match against United? Putting out his strongest XI might not have been such a bad idea in hindsight.



It's unlikely that this defeat will signal some kind of dramatic United free-fall but it cannot be denied that it has been on the cards for a while. Having got out of jail at Villa, West Brom and Blackpool to name but a few jammy recent examples, this defeat might signify that they have run out of free passes. You imagine it might have to serve as something of a wake up call for Fergie who will realise that If he wants to win yet another league title this season, performances on the road will have to be much better.

The loss for the Reds now means that they won't get to stick it to their rivals from North London by equaling the latter's achievement of going a whole league campaign unbeaten. For everyone concerned with United, this will ultimately prove irrelevant if they claim the more important accolade of a 19th title, bettering that of their enemies from Merseyside.

Speaking of whom, I may need to set aside this blog while I go and cut myself an uber slice of humble pie following the mini-revolution at Liverpool under Kenny Dalglish. I, like many others, thought 'The King' would be out of his depth having been out of the game for so long, coming back in a vastly different era to what he is used to and most importantly, having to manage with a fairly uninspiring squad of players.

Instead of being a resounding failure, Dalglish has seemingly transformed to fortunes of the club and after their 1-0 win over Chelsea – their fourth in a row – fans can start to dream once again. To play devil's advocate however, how much of this good run down to the influence of the man behind the man, former Chelsea assistant manager Steve Clark? Also, wasn't matchwinner and in-form Raul Meireles a Roy Hodgson signing?

Now just six points behind the blues with Wigan and West Ham to come in their next two games, some crazy fools might even start to speculate about a top four finish. Improbable? Maybe. Impossible? Not this season.

Of course, the sub plot to the match at Stamford Bridge was of course the debut of Anakin Skywalker after his £50m move to the dark side. Would he score? Would he celebrate??? Well, as it turned out that Fernando Torres had his best game for Liverpool in months after a performance that can politely be described as 'subdued' but was in fact probably closer to a big steaming pile of another word beginning with 'S'. Chelsea fans the world over will be hoping they don't have another Shevchenko (or worse, Sutton!) on their hands. Whatever he goes on to achieve during his spell with The Blues, Liverpool fans will certainly be feeling somewhat smug about what transpired on Sunday. The scousers have the last laugh ...for now.

Chelsea's recent renaissance came to a grinding halt in a game where they were lucky to come away with 'nil' such was the lack of any attacking invention in their play. It would be an act of gross stupidity to imagine that things won't fall into place sooner rather than later but on this occasion, for a side with a front line consisting of Drogba, Torres, Anelka and Frank Lampard supporting to not even muster a shot on target between them is nothing short of embarrassing. Equally embarrassing is the fact that after some obscene spending of some £70m, Chelsea actually managed to put in one of, if not THE worst performance of any of the 20 teams in the league this weekend. Isn't it funny that it was Liverpool's finest who once sang that "Money can't buy me love"?



Part Two to follow

Taken for Granted: Weekend Observations 14th - 15th January 2011: Part One

Saturday saw Manchester City beat Wolves 4-3 and finally hit the dizzy heights of the top of the Premier League (albeit for a mere 24 hours) ahead of their crosstown rivals. However, what at one point what looked like an emphatic ascension to the summit turned out to be quite a nervy stumble over the finish line as the blues took their foot off the proverbial pedal whilst cruising at 4-1, almost allowing Mick McCarthy's side to come away from Eastlands with an unlikely draw.

The usually resolute City defence had VERY bad day at the office in a very unMancini-like performance. I've always said that winning the league, for any team, will require defensive solidity and stability. It would be going too far to suggest that the City backline is looking questionable but let's not ignore the fact that in their last league game at Arsenal, they looked far from secure in the opening exchanges and were it not for the home side's innate profligacy, Kolo and the boys would have been dead and burried before half time. In fact, this weekend's match was not dissimilar in style to the kind of matches overlooked by Mark Hughes last season. The epic draw against Burnley being a prime example.

It's hard not to be patronising or to resort to tedious 'never say die' cliches when talking about Wolves but what else can be said about their performance? A great first half display wasn't justly rewarded and as the home side almost found to their cost, Wolves also finished the game strong. Few would have begrudged them an equaliser had it come. They fully contributed to the most entertaining game of the weekend.

The highlight of an eventful game was the mazy run and finish by Carlos Tevez for his pant-wettingly brilliant first goal. With all the recent talk of unhappiness, homesickness and general moaning about life, other players would have wilted and you imagine many failing to maintain anything close to high standards on the pitch. Carlitos has been as effective for his team when smiling (a horrible sight!) as he is when doing his best Mr. Grumpy impression. If only his teammates "cough" Emmanuel Adebayor "cough, cough!" would adopt anything like the same sort of attitude.

The rest of the Man City attack also performed brilliantly despite the absense of messes Silva and Balotelli – a good response after all the criticism they faced for a percieved lack of ambition after the Arsenal game. The highlights gave the impression that 27 million pound man Edin Dzeko looked lively enough to suggest that he won't be out of place in the Premier League and that I might just find myself eating my words once more.


In what many are desperately trying to convince themselves is the most exciting title race for years and years and and years, third placed, no-title-for-seven-years Arsenal are keeping pace and enhanced their credentials with a rather convincing 3-0 hammering of... er, the hammers of West Ham. The ruthlessness and ease with which they dispatched of the East Londeners provided something of a fine response to the previous week's cup humiliations.

Any football fan watching could surely not help but be impressed by the fluidity of the passing and movement in midfield but what will please gooners most was the impact of part-time striker, part-time first aid dummy Robin Van Persie. The Dutchman continues delight with his ability as much as he frustrates with his constant injuries. Can he stay fit? Imagine the impact he could have on Arsenal's title challenge if he does. But as is always the same old story with Arsenal, the question is: IF?! Next week, they will probably drop points at home to Wigan and find themselves in 'crisis' again.

One team certainly in a genuine state of something resembling a crisis is the side Arsenal the put to the sword without breaking any sort of sweat. Rumours were abound all weekend that the West Ham board were about ready to get shot of the world's happiest man, Avram Grant and replace him with a man who already has claret and blue paraphernalia in abundance, former Aston Villa boss Martin O'Neill. There has been a subsequent denial/show of support/vote of confidence from the club.

In truth, is it really fair to use a defeat against a side with title aspirations as an excuse to dump Avram? Recent results (the Newcastle massacre aside) would suggest something of an improvement in their fortunes. Bringing in a new manager at this point will surely just cause chaos in the changing room as a bunch of, let's face it, limited players try to adapt to a new way of thinking.

Besides, while admittedly achieving relative success at Wycombe and then Leicester, O'Neill's 'big' jobs at Celtic and Villa have involved something of a dependancy of being able to spend money. Something you cannot imagine he will be able to do at cash strapped West Ham. Is he a better manager that Grant? Almost certainly but you have to wonder if he could do any better with this current squad than the diminutive Israeli. You could argue that O'Neill would only damage his reputation by taking the Irons job. Keeping them up would be his minimum requirement and if he failed to do that he would be crucified.



However, if Grant had anything to do with the signing of Wayne Bridge, then that in itself is a sackable offence. What a shocker of a debut! The (thankfully) former England International was at some fault for all three Arsenal goals before putting the cherry on the cake by limping off injured before full time. People have suggested that he hasn't played much football recently and was rusty but whose fault is that? Bridge has been happy to sit on the bench at not one but TWO clubs for a number of years collecting a massive pay cheque and contributing the sum total of diddly squat. Bridge was SO bad that on Match of the Day, Alan Hansen who usually loves ridiculing poor defenders couldn't even be bothered to stick the boot in and so left him to Alan Shearer. When you have a striker and someone as dull as Shearer taking the piss out of your defending, maybe it's time to seek out a new career.

It wasn't a disastrous weekend for West Ham as almost all the teams in close proximity to them at the foot of the table failed to win their respective matches. The exception being West Brom who picked up a much needed and hard fought 3-2 win against a Blackpool side that continue to look at home in Premier League. Despite the loss, David Vaughan's opening goal for the tangerines was up there with some of the best at this level. Charlie Adam also displayed the kind of form that suggests there should be little surprise about the interest shown by other Premier League teams. If the likes of Steve Sidwell, Denilson, Keith Andrews, Lee Cattermole and Lucas can hold down careers at this level, then why not Adam?

Also down bottom, Fulham drew 1-1 at Wigan in a match where I was genuinely surprised to find out that Whites' goalscorer (in the loosest sense of the word) Andrew Johnson still existed.

For weeks I suggested Chelsea were going through a minor blip and would bounce back. The second I flip this and say that they might struggle to make the top four and their manager is in the firing line they decide to pick up the most routine of 2-0 victories over Blackburn. It is, how you say? Law of the sod. Branislav Ivanović, who opened the scoring showed footballers the world over the importance of shooting because the opposition defence may end up being just as abject as Rovers. Honestly, his shot seemed to have crept past the entire population of Blackburn as it trickled over the line! Speaking of whom, the Lancs club continued to make headlines for moments of sheer comedy by hiring former Arsenal barn door protector John Jensen as a coach. Given his almost tragic goalscoring record at Highbury, Rovers fans the world over will be hoping he isn't coaching their strikers.

Mind you his Only Arsenal goal wasn't that bad


Part Two to Follow...

Midweek Observations 4th-5th January - Part One: Managers on the brink

The sack race is on...

Wow! Has there ever been a single round of fixtures that has put so many football managers 'on the brink'? At 10pm on Wednesday night, speculation was rife that anything up to FOUR managers could be getting the boot after some disappointing and shocking results. The metaphorical crosshairs have been aimed at London, Birmingham and to the surprise of literally nobody who has ever even seen a football, Liverpool.

At the time of writing no-one has been handed their pink slip but I very much imagine that none of the four men about to be discussed will have gone to bed after their respective matches and had anything close to a decent night's kip.

The first manager waking up in a cold sweat is Roy Hodgson – a man I and many others have spoken about at length already this season. It's safe to say that 'Woy' was never a popular choice amongst Liverpool fans. His appointment seemed as perplexing as it was unexpected. Despite a wealth of past experience and relative success at Fulham just last season, was Hodgson really expected to transform the fortunes of the scouse sleeping giant? On the contrary, it turns out he is doing nothing more than accelerating their decline. This is by far the worst Liverpool FC have been since I began watching football and things seem to have reached something of a nadir over the last week with the shock defeat to Wolves at Anfield followed by the 3-1 demolition at the hands of Blackburn.



Yes, Liverpool are so bad that they were comprehensively beaten by the current laughing stock of the premier league; a team who can't seem to go a day without embarrassing themselves somehow. This week alone they've tried to shoehorn themselves into transfers they have no realistic chance of ever completing coupled with the fact their chairman genuinely believes watching some football on telly is a sufficient qualification to own a football club. Yes, boys and girls, Liverpool were beaten by this!

What made this defeat all the more remarkable (aside from the fact Benjani grabbed a brace...) was the fact that Hodgson has only ever been sacked from one other job in his entire career. Where was that you ask? That's right, when he was manager of Blackburn. Can't imagine he is too fond of this area of Lancs.

Back in August, Chelsea were riding on the crest of a wave. The rest of the league could only look on in awe as the blues were running rampant up and down the country like some sort of modern day Mongol army with Genghis Carlo at the helm. Such was their dominance, many of us imagined that they would have the title already wrapped up by the stage of the season and would be able to put their feet up as the rest looked on in envy.

But it wasn't meant to be as a freak result at home to Sunderland in November set the wheels in motion for what has become an almighty crisis at The Bridge culminating in Wednesday night's 1-0 humbling at the hands of a Wolves side that began the evening bottom of the league.

Giving Carlo Ancelotti the boot would have been unthinkable three months ago but given the fact Chelsea have only managed 7 points from the last 27 available, dropped from top spot to fifth and are now 9 points behind Manchester United having played a game more, questions will no doubt be asked. Aside from results, performances, both from individuals and as a team have been poor and uncharacteristic mistakes are being made throughout the team.



This result would suggest that the former Milan man cant seen to motivate or inspire this side at the moment and the longer the poor run goes on, the more difficult it will be to turn things around. In theory, a game against a side at the foot of the table would have been ideal to try and get things back on track but such is Chelsea's current state of malaise that even a team featuring Christophe Berra and Kevin Foley couldn't prove to be beatable.

But can you really sack a man who less than a year ago won the club's first ever league and cup double? Well, Roman Abramovich has never been shy in disposing of underperforming managers before despite previous successes as Jose Mourinho and to a lesser extent, Big Phil Scolari will testify. All eyes will be on the mysterious Russian Oligarch to see if he will pull the trigger on the Italian.

Wolves' win lifted them from the foot of the table where they were once again replaced by West Ham. The hapless hammers were annihilated 5-0 by Newcastle at St. James' Park. Much has been made of Avram Grant's 'leadership' so far this season but having lifted himself out of the drop zone for the first time in what seems like decades, some poor deluded fools might have thought West Ham could push on in their fight against the drop.

It wasn't so much the fact that West Ham lost but more the fact they were so emphatically humiliated. When you allow Leon Best, a striker whose goals per game ratio is so underwhelming it would be more effective to have a single block of lego leading the line, to score a hat trick then you know there are serious problems. A recent run of semi-decent form provided a glimmer of hope but the footballing lesson they received in the north east has brought them right back to earth with a bang. There is losing and then there is this; the grim reality of the situation they face if things continue as they are. A truly damaging defeat which could prove to be the last straw as far as Grant is concerned.



West Ham are joined in the drop zone by a side that just two seasons ago almost found themselves playing Champions League football. How times have changed. When Martin O'Neill left in the summer, people expected Aston Villa to return to midtable obscurity. No-one could have imagined they would be embroiled in a relegation battle. Gerrard Houllier was expected to steady the ship but like the captain of the Titantic, he seems to have steered said ship straight into an Iceberg. A 1-0 home defeat to a stunning Phil Bardsley goal for Sunderland has condemned the villains to drop below the dreaded dotted line on many printed versions of the league table.

Admittedly, Houllier been hamstrung by injuries to key players and been forced to field a number of youngsters but quite simply, and at the risk of getting caught in the sticky web of football cliché, with the likes of Young, Agbonlahor, Albrighton and Brad 'Hellboy' Friedel in goal, this Villa team, albeit not the top four challengers of years gone by, is far too good to go down (Yep, I said it!). The former Liverpool boss must be under pressure to stop the rot before the damage becomes irreparable.

While not want to endorse the sacking of any of the above, if messes Lerner, Abramovich, David Squared and whoever is in charge at Liverpool these days were to pick any time to get shot of their respective managers, you'd think that the first week of January would be the ideal time to do so. The transfer window is open allowing any potential incoming replacements the opportunity to make any 'cosmetic' changes needed to get their teams back on track.

You can't imagine there is much surgery needed at Stamford Bridge and Villa Park given the quality of players in both sides relative to their current repective aspirations (title challege and surviving relegation). However, in the cases of Liverpool and West Ham, you imagine they’d be wanting a full scale face lift.

So... who's going first?

Part Two to Follow... maybe

Weekend Observations 11th - 13th December 2010: Part Two

After the sacking of Chris Hughton last week you would have thought football would wait a few weeks before going completely mental again. No. Just a few days later ‘Big’ Sam Allardyce was relieved of his duties at Blackburn Rovers. A shocking decision on the face of it given the fact he was doing a fairly decent job of maintaining Rovers’ position of mid table mediocrity. Seeing as the Venky’s group – Blackburn’s new owners – recently claimed they were happy in that very position, their complete change of stance is baffling. The fact they don’t seem to even have a replacement lined up makes the whole situation even more nonsensical.

Mind you, having pumped a fortune into buying the club, they probably took one look at the Allardyce’s ‘style’ of football and understandably came to the conclusion they wanted to see something much better.

Allardyce was handed his pink slip off the back of a 2-1 defeat in the Lancashire/Greater Manchester/Somewhere-in-the-north-east derby against his former club Bolton. Given the way Allardyce celebrated his current side’s equaliser in front of the fans who once worshiped the ground he walked upon, you have to say Karma gave him a double dose of whoop-ass. Stuart Holdon’s stunning quickfire response that ultimately proved to be the winning goal was just the starter before the main course of Monday’s dramatic dismissal.

The abovementioned Newcastle played their first game under Alan ‘5 and a half years’ Pardew and what do you know? They beat Liverpool 3-1 and looked quite good in the process. Andy Carroll was on the scoresheet yet again and is proving to be something of a revelation. Credit where it is undoubtedly due for him being able to make the transition from Championship to Premier League almost seamlessly – something many young players struggle to do.

The game also featured a now customary Torres one-on-one miss and Joey Barton... well, being Joey Barton. For the record, I don’t think his ‘gesture’ was that offensive but having just returned from a three match ban and everything that has happened to him IN HIS LIFE up until this point, you’d hope he would apply something like common sense and keep his nose clean. I’m not the first to say it and certainly won’t be the last but if Barton concentrated on his football and stopped behaving like a dickhead at every opportunity, he would actually be quite the player.

Dr. Jackal/Mr. Hyde also scored the key second goal in the game. The Premier League have apparently moved to ‘remind him of his responsibilities’ but it would help if Barton actually what the word responsibility actually meant.



Now, before Geordies start proclaiming Pardew to be their new Messiah, let’s not forget that this is still Hughton’s team.

In keeping with the theme of under fire managers, Roy Hodgson has once again had to come out fighting this week in face of more criticism and speculation over his future. Hodgson is in danger of doing irreparable damage both to his reputation and to this current Liverpool team. A good manager no doubt but as the season has worn on, it has become clear that Hodgson quite simply won’t be able to deliver what the club wants and needs: Champions League football and eventually a title push. His terrible personal away record doesn’t appear to show any sign of improving either.

Sharing their neighbours cause for concern are Everton whose traditional slow start to the season has dragged itself almost to the halfway stage after a 0-0 draw with Wigan. “Some” people might say that you insist on signing AND playing Jermaine Beckford instead of a real striker then you deserve to sit just two points off the relegation zone... some people!

With West Ham putting up about as much of a fight in the relegation battle as an anaemic schoolchild in the UFC, Wolves picked up a massive 1-0 win against midlands rivals Birmingham while across the region, Gerard Houllier’s Aston Villa scored a much needed 2-1 win over rivals West Brom. All four of these sides have some sort of dislike or resentment towards one another. Can’t imagine the West Midlands was a fun place to be over the weekend.

Stephen Hunt’s decisive goal and Wolves’ subsequent win opened up a three point gap on the hapless hammers as well as inching themselves closer to safety. The bottom of the table remains congested as ever and Villa’s welcome victory gives Gerrard Houllier some much needed breathing space after a poor recent run. Those same people who say those unkind words about Jermaine Beckford may also suggest that it is no coincidence that Villa finally won a game after dropping Richard Dunne.

Results

Saturday

Aston Villa 2-1 West Brom
Everton 0-0 Wigan
Fulham 0-0 Sunderland
Newcastle 3-1 Liverpool
Stoke 0-1 Blackpool
West Ham 1-3 Manchester City

Sunday

Bolton 2-1 Blackburn
Tottenham 1-1 Chelsea
Wolves 1-0 Birmingham

Monday

Manchester United 1-0 Arsenal

Follow me on Twitter

Weekend Observations 4th - 6th December 2010: Part Two

Part One Here



On Monday, Gerrard Houllier, former Liverpool manager of early noughties plastic treble winning fame returned to Anfield with his new club Aston Villa. The home side were missing their 'spine' of Jamie Carragher, Stevie Gerrard and Fernando Torres through a combination of injuries and impending childbirth but any hopes of a shock evaporated in less than 20 minutes as a makeshift forward line of David N'Gog and Ryan Babel gave the Scousers an early two goal lead.

Given their form this season, it wasn't really a surprise to see Villa concede two goals that any defence not consisting of James Collins and Richard Dunne may have prevented. Although, in fairness, there was a big shout for offside with Babel's goal.

The life had been sucked out of the game and for the next 25 minutes the most entertaining thing going on was the creative swearing coming from the dugout area where the TV crews seemed to have inadvertently placed one of their microphones. Unfortunately, this was moved in the second half so all us fans of needless profanity were left disappointed.

Instead, we got a great example of how to offer nothing to a football match by Villa before Maxi Rodriguez iced the Liverpool cake with a sublime third. Forgotten signing of the season Joe Cole came on as did random signing of the season Robert Pires who did nothing but still looked more accomplished than worst signing of the season Stephen Ireland.

The 3-0 win saw Liverpool shoot up the table to the dizzying heights of 8th place – Interestingly, 3 points closer to top spot than at the same stage last season. Villa stay just two points off the relegation zone.

Just when you thought that peace had broken out at St. James' Park, Newcastle United leaped out from the shadows and soared to the top of their own self-erected pedestal of incompetence as if to say to the rest of us, "Hey, you've forgotten what a massive joke we are. We could no longer allow this. Point and laugh til your belly's are sore for we are the laughing stock of all of football!". Yes, following Sunday's 3-1 reverse at West Brom, Chris Hughton was sent packing from the Magpies managerial hotseat by trigger happy Mike Ashley and his cronies.



At the time of writing, Martin Jol seems to have cast aside his Ajax shackles and is primed to take over on Tyneside. As a fairly decent manager with the 'experience' they seem to so desperately desire. IF he does get the job, this will look like a good appointment on the face of it but you have to ask if changing a manager who was popular among players and fans alike is going to cause at least some level of disruption? What Hughton seemed to provide was some much-needed stability; something more important than a big name.

The West Brom defeat coupled with the recent humiliation at Bolton may well have contributed to the sacking but given the fact Hughton not only masterminded last years successful promotion campaign, but also this season's a 6-0 battering of Aston Villa, the emphatic Tyne-Wear derby win, wins at Everton and Arsenal and most recently a draw at home to the current league Champions (who they also beat in the Carling Cup), one would think he'd done enough to deserve a little more respect and his much sought after contract extension. Sadly, only in football do these kind of achievements get 'rewarded' in such a way. Needless to say, the reaction has initially been one of anger and disbelief. As a result, many 'neutrals' wouldn't be too disappointed to see the Loony Toon Army plummet down the table once more and find themselves back in the Championship where they were when Hughton was originally appointed caretaker manager.

If Newcastle are to be drawn into a relegation battle, they will have to go some way do wrestle the wooden spoon away from either West Ham or Wolves. You have to wonder if these sides are actually trying to finish last following a bizarre weekend when West Ham moved off the bottom of the table on goal difference despite not playing on Saturday thanks to Wolves' 3-0 defeat at Blackburn. However, the Hammers returned to the foot of the table following their 1-0 defeat at Sunderland 24 hours later.

Wolves can feel hard done by given the fact they were by far and away better than their Lancashire conquerers but due to a fetish for pinging the ball off the goal frame and making Paul Robinson look like a competent goalkeeper (a crime worthy of relegation in itself) they instead came away on the wrong end of a hiding. Another good performance from Mick McCarthy's men but no result to match. The annual hard luck story of at least one side doomed to the dreaded drop.

West Ham haven't won away from Upton Park in the league since the first day of last season and this most recent bout of travel sickness has piled yet more pressure on Avram Grant. The winning goal from Jordan Henderson capped off a fine team move and was worthy of winning any game although in truth, I'm not sure many people realistically expected West Ham to get anything against a Sunderland side who are quite formidable on home soil. Any 'extra' pressure on the diminutive Isreali is not really justified in my eyes.



That said, the Irons are looking something of a shambles in the league and you imagine that if it wasn't for last week's hugely unexpected victory over Manchester United in the Carling Cup, Sir Avram would be standing alongside Chris Hughton in the dole queue right about now.

Follow me on Twitter

Results

Saturday

Arsenal 2-1 Fulham
Birmingham 1-1 Tottenham
Blackburn 3-0 Wolves
Blackpool P-P Manchester United
Chelsea 1-1 Everton
Man City 1-0 Bolton
Wigan 2-2 Stoke

Sunday

Sunderland 1-0 West Ham
West Brom 3-1 Newcastle

Monday

Liverpool 3-0 Aston Villa

Weekend Observations 27th - 28th November 2010

So, Dimitar Berbatov ended something of a goal scoring drought by hitting FIVE as Manchester United publicly violated Blackburn Rovers in an encounter that proved to be about as evenly matched as a pack of hungry mountain wolves in a classroom full of anemic schoolchildren.



'Berba' has divided opinion amongst the Old Trafford faithful for a long time now with many deeming him a waste of money given the £30million transfer fee it took to bring him from White Hart Lane way back when. However, his form at the start of this season, culminating in a spectacular hat-trick against Liverpool, had some crazy people comparing him to a United legend of years gone by.

Since that day over two months ago, karma being what is would dictate that the Bulgarian would fail to find the net again until his deluge of goals on Saturday. These non-scoring matches meant of course that fans would do an about turn and once again suggest that Berbatov doesn't perform well enough, is clearly not good enough for United etc etc. This has ultimately led to possibly the most underwhelming reaction to a 5-goal haul and a 7-1 win ever.

Not much in the way of sycophantic praise this time around but rather the simple realisation that players have good days and bad days. Of course, sublime overhead kicks and hat tricks cannot be expected every week but as these strikes currently see Berba at the top of the Premier League scoring charts, United fans and commentators need to realise how good they've got it particularly when Wayne Rooney continues to perform worse than a deaf mute trying to win some kind of popular televised signing contest.

Amusingly, the team on the receiving end of the humping were Blackburn, managed by Big Sam Allardyce. Yes, the very same Sam Allardyce who recently suggested he would be better suited to managing Inter Milan or Real Madrid (although, given their own pasting in Monday's El Clasico, maybe Big Sam may not be so out of place!). I would say something about him eating humble pie right now but it probably wouldn't be the only pastry based snack he'd be stuffing down his large, insufferable throat.

United reached the Premier League summit at the expense of Chelsea who continue to stutter, this week only managing a 1-all draw at Newcastle. Like last week against Birmingham, the blues were unable to fully recover from conceding a sloppy early goal and capitalise on their possession and chances.

The one talking point of an otherwise unremarkable match however was the fact that Chelsea's often lethal strike force failed to get the better of the evergreen Sol Campbell who once again, refuses to be written off and continues to perform at the top level. Yes, the game was that uneventful.



In contrast, the later game on Sunday provided tons of incident as Tottenham come from behind once again to beat Liverpool 2-1 at White Hart Lane. Once again, comeback specialists Spurs showed they don't know when they are beaten as Aaron Lennon secured the three points in stoppage time, despite missing their fourth penalty of the season and the visitors missing a hat-full of chances to put the game out of sight when leading. This wasn't like limp Liverpool performances of earlier in the season as they took the game to the hosts. But for some 'charitable' Paul Konchesky defending and if Fernando Torres and Maxi Rodriguez had invested in some shooting boots, we may well be sitting here talking about Liverpool being back on track and laughing heartily when people suggest Tottenham could challenge for the title.

Speaking of getting back on track, after a week to forget, Arsenal beat Aston Villa 4-2 at Villa Park in a game that only differed from last weekend's North London Derby in terms of the final scoreline. Like last weekend, Arsenal bossed the first half. Like Last weekend the gunners were 2-0 up and half time. Like last weekend they allowed the opposition a way back into the game early in the second half but unlike last weekend they were able to kick on and make the game safe but not without a scare or two. The most interesting assessment of Arsenal I read (somehwere) this week was the conclusion that the only way Arsene Wenger's team can ever be sure of winning a given game is by scoring at least 4 goals. Anything less and the opposition will back themselves to find a way back into it.

Controversy and the confusion over offsides reared their respective heads when Villa scored their first and ultimately fruitless goal as Big John Carew was gingerly meandering about the penalty area while injured and quite obviously blocked the view of Arsenal “goalkeeper” Luckaz Fabianski as Ciaran Clark struck to reduce the deficit. Whether Carew was 'interfering' or not was the debate but alas, given that this isn't the first incident of this type this season alone, it's safe to say that the officials are going to almost always give the benefit of doubt to the attacking team. More goals, fun game, right? Difficult to see how defending teams can combat it.

The weekend saw a record number of goals scored. 41 in total as all 20 teams managed to find the back of the net somehow. And that my friends, is the most goals scored in any weekend of a league season since the Sky-Sponsored, money-driven, commercial entity that is the Premier League was reduced to 20 teams in 1995.

Everton's hit and miss seson continued as they totally capitulated in a 4-1 defeat at home against West Brom. This shock scoreline was partly down to Mikael Arteta being controversially sent off. However, the outcome was rarely in doubt thanks mostly to tormentor in chief, the vastly underrated Chris Brunt whose free kick to score the Baggies' second on the day was as good you are ever likely to see anywhere in football.

That said, even Brunt's amazing strike was nothing compared to the simply stupendous team effort from Bolton when Mark Davies finished off an incredible passing move to score the equaliser against Blackpool. Honestly, the result may have dented what small aspirations Wanderers have of playing in Europe next season, but Davies' goal and the passage of play that preceded it would not look out of place in the Champions League such was it's quality.



Finally, down at the bottom of the league, Wolves dramatic late winner against the ever unpredictable Sunderland will have taken a bit of pressure off of Mick McCarthy as his side closed in on the teams above them. Credit to the big dopey Yorkshireman for keeping the spirits up and continuing to get the best out of what is, let's be honest, a team of slightly above average Championship players. They have played well enough in recent games and it was only a matter of time before these performances were rewarded with results.

This would have wound up those cheeky cockneys from Upton Park. Ebanks-Blake's last gasp winner means that West Ham remain bottom of the table despite their first league win since forever against their direct rivals for the league's wooden spoon Wigan who themselves look nothing short of hopeless.


Results

Saturday

Aston Villa 2-4 Arsenal
Bolton 2-2 Blackpool
Everton 1-4 West brom
Fulham 1-1 Birmingham
Man Utd 7-1 Blackburn
Stoke 1-1 Man City
West Ham 3-1 Wigan
Wolves 3-2 Sunderland

Sunday

Newcastle 1-1 Chelsea
Tottenham 2-1 Liverpool

Follow me on Twitter