Taken for Granted: Weekend Observations 14th - 15th January 2011: Part One

Saturday saw Manchester City beat Wolves 4-3 and finally hit the dizzy heights of the top of the Premier League (albeit for a mere 24 hours) ahead of their crosstown rivals. However, what at one point what looked like an emphatic ascension to the summit turned out to be quite a nervy stumble over the finish line as the blues took their foot off the proverbial pedal whilst cruising at 4-1, almost allowing Mick McCarthy's side to come away from Eastlands with an unlikely draw.

The usually resolute City defence had VERY bad day at the office in a very unMancini-like performance. I've always said that winning the league, for any team, will require defensive solidity and stability. It would be going too far to suggest that the City backline is looking questionable but let's not ignore the fact that in their last league game at Arsenal, they looked far from secure in the opening exchanges and were it not for the home side's innate profligacy, Kolo and the boys would have been dead and burried before half time. In fact, this weekend's match was not dissimilar in style to the kind of matches overlooked by Mark Hughes last season. The epic draw against Burnley being a prime example.

It's hard not to be patronising or to resort to tedious 'never say die' cliches when talking about Wolves but what else can be said about their performance? A great first half display wasn't justly rewarded and as the home side almost found to their cost, Wolves also finished the game strong. Few would have begrudged them an equaliser had it come. They fully contributed to the most entertaining game of the weekend.

The highlight of an eventful game was the mazy run and finish by Carlos Tevez for his pant-wettingly brilliant first goal. With all the recent talk of unhappiness, homesickness and general moaning about life, other players would have wilted and you imagine many failing to maintain anything close to high standards on the pitch. Carlitos has been as effective for his team when smiling (a horrible sight!) as he is when doing his best Mr. Grumpy impression. If only his teammates "cough" Emmanuel Adebayor "cough, cough!" would adopt anything like the same sort of attitude.

The rest of the Man City attack also performed brilliantly despite the absense of messes Silva and Balotelli – a good response after all the criticism they faced for a percieved lack of ambition after the Arsenal game. The highlights gave the impression that 27 million pound man Edin Dzeko looked lively enough to suggest that he won't be out of place in the Premier League and that I might just find myself eating my words once more.


In what many are desperately trying to convince themselves is the most exciting title race for years and years and and years, third placed, no-title-for-seven-years Arsenal are keeping pace and enhanced their credentials with a rather convincing 3-0 hammering of... er, the hammers of West Ham. The ruthlessness and ease with which they dispatched of the East Londeners provided something of a fine response to the previous week's cup humiliations.

Any football fan watching could surely not help but be impressed by the fluidity of the passing and movement in midfield but what will please gooners most was the impact of part-time striker, part-time first aid dummy Robin Van Persie. The Dutchman continues delight with his ability as much as he frustrates with his constant injuries. Can he stay fit? Imagine the impact he could have on Arsenal's title challenge if he does. But as is always the same old story with Arsenal, the question is: IF?! Next week, they will probably drop points at home to Wigan and find themselves in 'crisis' again.

One team certainly in a genuine state of something resembling a crisis is the side Arsenal the put to the sword without breaking any sort of sweat. Rumours were abound all weekend that the West Ham board were about ready to get shot of the world's happiest man, Avram Grant and replace him with a man who already has claret and blue paraphernalia in abundance, former Aston Villa boss Martin O'Neill. There has been a subsequent denial/show of support/vote of confidence from the club.

In truth, is it really fair to use a defeat against a side with title aspirations as an excuse to dump Avram? Recent results (the Newcastle massacre aside) would suggest something of an improvement in their fortunes. Bringing in a new manager at this point will surely just cause chaos in the changing room as a bunch of, let's face it, limited players try to adapt to a new way of thinking.

Besides, while admittedly achieving relative success at Wycombe and then Leicester, O'Neill's 'big' jobs at Celtic and Villa have involved something of a dependancy of being able to spend money. Something you cannot imagine he will be able to do at cash strapped West Ham. Is he a better manager that Grant? Almost certainly but you have to wonder if he could do any better with this current squad than the diminutive Israeli. You could argue that O'Neill would only damage his reputation by taking the Irons job. Keeping them up would be his minimum requirement and if he failed to do that he would be crucified.



However, if Grant had anything to do with the signing of Wayne Bridge, then that in itself is a sackable offence. What a shocker of a debut! The (thankfully) former England International was at some fault for all three Arsenal goals before putting the cherry on the cake by limping off injured before full time. People have suggested that he hasn't played much football recently and was rusty but whose fault is that? Bridge has been happy to sit on the bench at not one but TWO clubs for a number of years collecting a massive pay cheque and contributing the sum total of diddly squat. Bridge was SO bad that on Match of the Day, Alan Hansen who usually loves ridiculing poor defenders couldn't even be bothered to stick the boot in and so left him to Alan Shearer. When you have a striker and someone as dull as Shearer taking the piss out of your defending, maybe it's time to seek out a new career.

It wasn't a disastrous weekend for West Ham as almost all the teams in close proximity to them at the foot of the table failed to win their respective matches. The exception being West Brom who picked up a much needed and hard fought 3-2 win against a Blackpool side that continue to look at home in Premier League. Despite the loss, David Vaughan's opening goal for the tangerines was up there with some of the best at this level. Charlie Adam also displayed the kind of form that suggests there should be little surprise about the interest shown by other Premier League teams. If the likes of Steve Sidwell, Denilson, Keith Andrews, Lee Cattermole and Lucas can hold down careers at this level, then why not Adam?

Also down bottom, Fulham drew 1-1 at Wigan in a match where I was genuinely surprised to find out that Whites' goalscorer (in the loosest sense of the word) Andrew Johnson still existed.

For weeks I suggested Chelsea were going through a minor blip and would bounce back. The second I flip this and say that they might struggle to make the top four and their manager is in the firing line they decide to pick up the most routine of 2-0 victories over Blackburn. It is, how you say? Law of the sod. Branislav Ivanović, who opened the scoring showed footballers the world over the importance of shooting because the opposition defence may end up being just as abject as Rovers. Honestly, his shot seemed to have crept past the entire population of Blackburn as it trickled over the line! Speaking of whom, the Lancs club continued to make headlines for moments of sheer comedy by hiring former Arsenal barn door protector John Jensen as a coach. Given his almost tragic goalscoring record at Highbury, Rovers fans the world over will be hoping he isn't coaching their strikers.

Mind you his Only Arsenal goal wasn't that bad


Part Two to Follow...

Midweek Observations 4th-5th January - Part One: Managers on the brink

The sack race is on...

Wow! Has there ever been a single round of fixtures that has put so many football managers 'on the brink'? At 10pm on Wednesday night, speculation was rife that anything up to FOUR managers could be getting the boot after some disappointing and shocking results. The metaphorical crosshairs have been aimed at London, Birmingham and to the surprise of literally nobody who has ever even seen a football, Liverpool.

At the time of writing no-one has been handed their pink slip but I very much imagine that none of the four men about to be discussed will have gone to bed after their respective matches and had anything close to a decent night's kip.

The first manager waking up in a cold sweat is Roy Hodgson – a man I and many others have spoken about at length already this season. It's safe to say that 'Woy' was never a popular choice amongst Liverpool fans. His appointment seemed as perplexing as it was unexpected. Despite a wealth of past experience and relative success at Fulham just last season, was Hodgson really expected to transform the fortunes of the scouse sleeping giant? On the contrary, it turns out he is doing nothing more than accelerating their decline. This is by far the worst Liverpool FC have been since I began watching football and things seem to have reached something of a nadir over the last week with the shock defeat to Wolves at Anfield followed by the 3-1 demolition at the hands of Blackburn.



Yes, Liverpool are so bad that they were comprehensively beaten by the current laughing stock of the premier league; a team who can't seem to go a day without embarrassing themselves somehow. This week alone they've tried to shoehorn themselves into transfers they have no realistic chance of ever completing coupled with the fact their chairman genuinely believes watching some football on telly is a sufficient qualification to own a football club. Yes, boys and girls, Liverpool were beaten by this!

What made this defeat all the more remarkable (aside from the fact Benjani grabbed a brace...) was the fact that Hodgson has only ever been sacked from one other job in his entire career. Where was that you ask? That's right, when he was manager of Blackburn. Can't imagine he is too fond of this area of Lancs.

Back in August, Chelsea were riding on the crest of a wave. The rest of the league could only look on in awe as the blues were running rampant up and down the country like some sort of modern day Mongol army with Genghis Carlo at the helm. Such was their dominance, many of us imagined that they would have the title already wrapped up by the stage of the season and would be able to put their feet up as the rest looked on in envy.

But it wasn't meant to be as a freak result at home to Sunderland in November set the wheels in motion for what has become an almighty crisis at The Bridge culminating in Wednesday night's 1-0 humbling at the hands of a Wolves side that began the evening bottom of the league.

Giving Carlo Ancelotti the boot would have been unthinkable three months ago but given the fact Chelsea have only managed 7 points from the last 27 available, dropped from top spot to fifth and are now 9 points behind Manchester United having played a game more, questions will no doubt be asked. Aside from results, performances, both from individuals and as a team have been poor and uncharacteristic mistakes are being made throughout the team.



This result would suggest that the former Milan man cant seen to motivate or inspire this side at the moment and the longer the poor run goes on, the more difficult it will be to turn things around. In theory, a game against a side at the foot of the table would have been ideal to try and get things back on track but such is Chelsea's current state of malaise that even a team featuring Christophe Berra and Kevin Foley couldn't prove to be beatable.

But can you really sack a man who less than a year ago won the club's first ever league and cup double? Well, Roman Abramovich has never been shy in disposing of underperforming managers before despite previous successes as Jose Mourinho and to a lesser extent, Big Phil Scolari will testify. All eyes will be on the mysterious Russian Oligarch to see if he will pull the trigger on the Italian.

Wolves' win lifted them from the foot of the table where they were once again replaced by West Ham. The hapless hammers were annihilated 5-0 by Newcastle at St. James' Park. Much has been made of Avram Grant's 'leadership' so far this season but having lifted himself out of the drop zone for the first time in what seems like decades, some poor deluded fools might have thought West Ham could push on in their fight against the drop.

It wasn't so much the fact that West Ham lost but more the fact they were so emphatically humiliated. When you allow Leon Best, a striker whose goals per game ratio is so underwhelming it would be more effective to have a single block of lego leading the line, to score a hat trick then you know there are serious problems. A recent run of semi-decent form provided a glimmer of hope but the footballing lesson they received in the north east has brought them right back to earth with a bang. There is losing and then there is this; the grim reality of the situation they face if things continue as they are. A truly damaging defeat which could prove to be the last straw as far as Grant is concerned.



West Ham are joined in the drop zone by a side that just two seasons ago almost found themselves playing Champions League football. How times have changed. When Martin O'Neill left in the summer, people expected Aston Villa to return to midtable obscurity. No-one could have imagined they would be embroiled in a relegation battle. Gerrard Houllier was expected to steady the ship but like the captain of the Titantic, he seems to have steered said ship straight into an Iceberg. A 1-0 home defeat to a stunning Phil Bardsley goal for Sunderland has condemned the villains to drop below the dreaded dotted line on many printed versions of the league table.

Admittedly, Houllier been hamstrung by injuries to key players and been forced to field a number of youngsters but quite simply, and at the risk of getting caught in the sticky web of football cliché, with the likes of Young, Agbonlahor, Albrighton and Brad 'Hellboy' Friedel in goal, this Villa team, albeit not the top four challengers of years gone by, is far too good to go down (Yep, I said it!). The former Liverpool boss must be under pressure to stop the rot before the damage becomes irreparable.

While not want to endorse the sacking of any of the above, if messes Lerner, Abramovich, David Squared and whoever is in charge at Liverpool these days were to pick any time to get shot of their respective managers, you'd think that the first week of January would be the ideal time to do so. The transfer window is open allowing any potential incoming replacements the opportunity to make any 'cosmetic' changes needed to get their teams back on track.

You can't imagine there is much surgery needed at Stamford Bridge and Villa Park given the quality of players in both sides relative to their current repective aspirations (title challege and surviving relegation). However, in the cases of Liverpool and West Ham, you imagine they’d be wanting a full scale face lift.

So... who's going first?

Part Two to Follow... maybe

Sweet FA

March 8th 2008 was a great day for Schadenfreude.

Schadenfreude, quite simply, is a German expression meaning ‘taking pleasure from the misfortune of others’. In football, Schadenfreude takes place on an almost daily basis. How many times have you been at a match and been delighted to hear that your arch rivals have lost, even if it has no barring on the fortunes of your own side?
Yesterday’s FA Cup results are a fine example of this. Up and down the country, fans were united in their unconfined joy to see the Salford Bay Rowdies and CSKA Fulham surprisingly both crash out against unfancied opposition, thus sparing us another snorefest that was last year’s final between the two sides.

At Old Trafford, The Rowdies dominated an extraordinary match against ‘arry’s Pompey side but profligacy, heroic defending and dodgy refereeing saw them lose out to a late Sulley Muntari penalty after Milan Baros was felled my Tomasz Kuszczak.

Over the past few weeks, L’Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger has been labelled a whinger, moaner etc in the aftermath of the infamous Taylor-Eduardo incident. Many ignored the fact that Wenger retracted his outburst and chose to crucify him as if he is the cause for all the wrongs in the world. Meanwhile Martin Taylor was lauded as some kind of Martyr. The whole disgusting episode just reinforced the idea that fans, media and pundits alike choose to prioritise petty footballing rivalries over common sense and the fact a professional footballer was nearly crippled.

My point? Simply that I await the fall-out of Sir Taggart’s and Golum’s (Quiroz) rantings about the referee Martin Atkinson and the borderline slanderous remarks and Keith Hackett. Will they be slated in the same way Wenger was? Unlikely.

Sir Taggart’s main area of contention was the fact his side weren’t awarded a penalty during the early exchanges. While it probably was a bad decision, does anyone really believe that it changed the game? The Rowdies had many chances to win the game and didn’t take them. To single out that one incident is ridiculously short-sighted. As for the complaints about bad tackles, I love the way Wayne Rooney’s horrible lunge on Niko Kranjcar was conveniently ignored by The Rowdies and the press alike.

But that’s not to take away from the brilliant Pompey defending. Sol Campbell has had an interesting relationship with The Rowdies in his career. He once scored a brace in a 2-2 draw for Spurs and won the title at Old Trafford in his first season at L’Arse. However, he has also received two seperate FA bans for incidents in matches against The Reds (the first of which costing him an FA Cup final appearance) and was wrongly adjudged to have fouled Wayne Rooney in the infamous match that ended The Gunners’ record unbeaten run.

Today, the England man can smile after exacting a measure of revenge by putting in arguably his best performance since joining Portsmouth two summer’s ago.

Meanwhile, in sunny Yorkshire, the football story of the season was about to unfold as Championship strugglers Barnsley were preparing to take on CSKA Fulham.

Having beaten Liverpool at Anfield in the last round, I very much doubt that anyone thought Lightning would strike twice. Unfortunately for CSKA, The Tykes were very much of the opinion that it does!

CSKA couldn’t get into their stride on a poor pitch and Barnsley probably had the better chances in the first half. Unfortunately, their finishing was very much of Championship standard.

The hapless Kayode Odejayi was booed by his own fans last week after just 2 goals in some 30-odd appearances since joining The Tykes last summer.
Of course he was going to score the winner.

Cue some real backs to the wall defending in closing minutes and a pitch invasion by some very happy Yorkshiremen at the final whistle.

While it was undoubtedly Barnsley’s day, CSKA need to take a good long hard look at themselves. For the second time in a matter of weeks, they’ve failed to show up in an important cup game and all the recent talk of Quadruples has fallen shorter than even their diminutive manager.

Avram Grant has lost games against The Rowdies, L’Arse, and the two recent cup games. While he has gone about his business in the league and Champions League fairly unnoticed, his ability to handle pressure in the ‘Big Games’ is questionable. He’s failed all the big tests he’s had to face so far and while I feel the criticism he gets from spoilt CSKA fans to be somewhat unfair, he’s certainly does not look up to the task of fulfilling Peter Kenyon’s world domination dream.

The Barnsley win was particularly satisfying coming off the back of John Terry’s boastful assertion earlier in the week that CSKA can ‘play anyone off the park’.

So after years of putting up with The Rowdies and more recently, CSKA dominating English football and churning out matches like last year’s cup final, it will be a breath of fresh air on Saturday May 17th to see a couple of new faces battling for the famous old trophy.

Carling Cup Final Review

On cup final day, the result is more important than the performance. Tottenham Hotspur provided both as they deservedly won their first trophy this century after outplaying CSKA Fulham at Wembley today.

While the game wasn’t the most exciting as a spectacle (when are cup finals ever?), a heroic Spurs fightback saw them peg back the holders after going 1-0 down to a Didier Drogba free-kick in the first half.

CSKA have not had their full compliment of players for some time. Today saw the return of ‘Fwank’ Lampard (Lumpo’lard?) and John Terry. Add that to the fact the club’s African contingent were all back gave Avram Grant with one of those selection headaches that managers up and down the country would love.

The CSKA bench consisted of Joe Cole, Michael Ballack and Alex. The term ‘embarrassment of riches’ has never been so apt.

Spurs started like a house of fire (if a house on fire is considered a good thing...) with Keane almost opening the scoring after just 25 seconds. Only a typical John ‘No regard for my own well-being as long as we don’t concede’ Terry block prevented the Lilywhites taking the lead while the national anthem was still ringing in everyone’s ears.

The first half continued in this vein. Tottenham were dictating the play as CSKA struggled to find their feet. I say this in the most literal sense as players falling over almost habitually. The over-zealous groundsman at Wembley had clearly over-watered the pitch beforehand. Of course, some players don’t need any such invitation to hit the deck. Didier Drogba was a frequent victim of the sniper in the crowd and I’m also sure I saw Jermaine Jenas rolling around clutching his face after bumping into Ricardo Carvalho. I was later assured that I was wrong as English players don’t dive apparently.

The Drog’s inability to stay vertical won his side a dangerous free kick on the edge of the Tottenham penalty area following a reckless challenge by his fellow countryman Didier Zokora. CSKA had missed 2 free kicks just minutes earlier so you’d think Zakora would have known not to make a silly challenge.

Then again, this was Didier Zokora!

The good Didier made him pay as he curled his shot around the wall into the bottom corner of Paul ‘Not as fat but equally not good’ Robinson in the Spurs goal. ‘Robbo’ was one of the few Spurs players not to come out with much glory. Having flapped at many a corner I’m going to quite harshly suggest he could have at least attempted to save the free-kick. He was on that side of the goal and shuffled across leaving the area exposed for Drogba. Not taking anything away from the free kick mind.

There wasn’t much to write home about either side of half time as CSKA reverted to the containment strategy that has become the norm at The Kremlin (Stamford Bridge) in recent years.

Tottenham were in control but struggling to find the breakthrough. Ramos tried to change this up by introducing Tom ‘Slim’ Huddlestone to add something extra to his attack. This proved to be a success but before that, a word on the substituted Pascal Chimbonda. There’s disappointment and there is being a twat. Chimbonda skulked off down the tunnel without so much of a glance at the bench. Lo and behold, when his side won, who was there in the middle of all the celebrations? You guessed it. Far be it from me to reinforce negative borderline racist stereotypes but what is it with the French moaning and sulking this weekend???

Back to the game and it was ‘The Hud’ who was directly involved in the Spurs equaliser. Having controlled a cross into the box, the bouncing ball struck Wayne Bridge on the arm. The linesman frantically waved his flag signalling the offence and Mark Halsey pointed to the spot. It may have been slightly harsh on Bridge but after his theatrics (2:12 – looks for the linesman before falling over) in last year’s final which resulted in Arsenal’s Emanuel Adebayor being wrongly sent off after a case of mistaken identity, you have to feel it was a form of poetic justice for the England man.

Berbatov rolled the ball into the net from the spot and the Tottenham half of Wembley stadium was rocking. 1-all and the north Londoners were in the ascendancy. They were unfortunate not to get a winner in normal time thanks to the ineptitude of, shock, horror, Didier Zokora. The Ivorian found himself bearing down on goal with just minutes to go. His touch let him down and he struck a weak shot straight at Cech. However good fortune saw the rebound fall back at his feet but with the goal at his mercy, he struck high and wide. Didier Zokora has never scored for Tottenham and if he can miss chances like that, he probably never will.

So to extra time. Within four minutes, Jermaine Jenas floated a free-kick into the box where a poor Pter Cech punch rebounded off the head of Jonathan Woodgate and bounced oh so slowly into the goal to give Tottenham a deserved lead. The marking by CSKA was amateur. I’m still not prepared to buy into the recent hype around Jermaine Jenas but I had to admit he did make ‘Fwank’ look quite average in the middle of the park during the course of the game.

Even the introduction of Ballack and Joe Cole wasn’t enough to inspire a fightback. CSKA dominated as they tried to find an equaliser but couldn’t penetrate the Spurs defence. The final whistle eventually came and Junde Ramos reinforced his reputation as a cup specialist.

People will cynically tell you that the Carling Cup doesn’t matter. That Tottenham’s jubilation at the end of the game was unwarranted.

This is slightly unfair as the win (despite Zokora) means Tottenham are guaranteed a place in Europe once again next season – something they can’t be sure of obtaining via their league position. Also, for a club so starved of silverwear every trophy is important. Beating CSKA and making John Terry cry must have also been quite enjoyable.